Archive for the ‘oy’ Category

Insight into the cuckoo’s nest that rests on my neck   Leave a comment

I just got back from 2 weeks at my parents –more on that later — but while I was there I went on my mother’s dial-up computer with no web browser except AOL to read my mail. In a mysterious moment, three e-mails from people who were lovely enough to write me kind words about my book were suddenly gone; sucked into the vortex that surrounds my mother and her kitchen.

As someone who has so few things to take great pride in, I am killing myself for not writing back to these people. I ALWAYS WRITE BACK when someone sends me a note and now there are three people in the world who think I’m as rude as a stain. I saw each of their e-mails for a few seconds and am tempted to go to a hypnotist to see if their addresses can be recalled in a trance state.  I think one of them was named Nancy ….  and the others were Frank and Joe Hardy.

Stupid head, think!

Posted July 13, 2008 by julieklam in oy

Where’s the moth?   Leave a comment

Last night while I was cooking dinner a moth the size of a pigeon flew into my kitchen and settled on the ceiling. I didn’t want to freak Violet out so I told Paul in pig latin and he said he would have to deal with it after Violet went to sleep. Wouldn’t you know it, Paul fell asleep at the exact same moment as Violet and I was left alone with the mother of all moths (I feel I should capitalize Moth — it was that big).

I didn’t want to sit under, waiting for it to fall in my hair, so got a mop and wrapped a towel on it and smacked it. It fell on the floor and then — IT WAS GONE! Where is it? I’ve looked everywhere. I don’t think it could’ve flown in its condition, but what do I know? I am assuming it’s nesting in my only cashmere sweater isn’t full of holes.

Posted June 6, 2008 by julieklam in oy

Please excuse MY daughter   Leave a comment

I have a sick kid home today, she was really a wreck this weekend, that terrible raging fever that little kids get. She is a bit better today. Actually, she’s slightly feverish but in very good spirits which means she has just enough energy for some Disney Princess tea parties. I realized last night that the six words that send chills down my spine are “Let’s play in my room, Mom.”

I think I’ll bring my blackberry.

Posted January 28, 2008 by julieklam in oy